My three-year-old son, like most children, has not quite mastered the art of patience. He wants his breakfast on the table before I can utter a “Good morning, sleepyhead.” I try to explain the importance of patience, and even resort to one of those silly preschool songs about patience that as a single adult I swore I would never sing. Yet after all my futile attempts, he looks up at me with his big, eager eyes and says, “But Mommy, patience is berry hard for me.” And he’s right.

Patience is not only difficult for three-year-olds; it’s problematic for adults as well. We want what we want—and we want it now! Sometimes we want it yesterday, but right this minute will suffice. I believe patience is submission in disguise . . . submitting to God’s plan for us.

We see the importance of patience in John 2:1-11—the story of Jesus’ first miracle when he turns water into wine. Here we see Jesus, his mother, and five of his 12 disciples attending a wedding in Cana near his hometown of Nazareth.

During the week-long celebration, Jesus’ mother approaches him with a problem: the wine supply is depleted. In ancient Israel, running out of wine was not just a simple oversight on the part of the party planner. This social faux paus signified a bridegroom’s failure to adequately provide for his guests. Such an event brought social disgrace to his name and haunted the newly married couple their entire lives. The bridegroom would also lose financially because he would have to repay about half of the wedding gifts they received. Mary understood the gravity of the situation and approached Jesus, hoping he would remedy the problem.

Yet Jesus did not react the way Mary had hoped. “‘Dear woman, why do you involve me?’ Jesus replied, ‘My time has not yet come.’” (John 2:4, NIV)

This verse translates, “Your concern and mine are not the same.” Some scholars believe Mary was in some way responsible for the catering at this wedding, so naturally she worried about the lack of wine. Yet Jesus’ concern was more eternal. He knew the time had not yet arrived for him to reveal himself as the Messiah.

Jesus’ patience and restraint as well as Mary’s response teach us a great lesson on the importance of patience. Jesus remains confident in His Father’s timing for his earthly ministry. He refuses to rush into performing public miracles just to satisfy his mother’s immediate need.

Mary realizes a couple things as a result of Jesus’ response to her request. First, she realizes that our loyalty belongs to God first and family second. By not immediately rescuing his mother, Jesus teaches her that his obedience to his Heavenly Father outweighs his obedience to his earthly mother. Ouch! Kind of stings like a bee. Yet God expects this level of loyalty from His children. “Anyone who comes to me but refuses to let go of father, mother, spouse, children, brothers, sisters—yes, even one’s own self!—can’t be my disciple.” (Luke 14:26, MSG)

Second, Mary learns that God demands our submission and respect. She respected Jesus by not nagging him or begging him to fix the problem. She still hoped he would help, and even told the servants to, “Do whatever he tells you.” (John 2:5, NIV) Yet she remained patient, trusting in Jesus.

We also learn that patience requires not only trusting what God will do, but also trusting in God’s timing. Jesus tells his mother, “. . . My time has not yet come.” (John 2:4, NIV). He knew he would eventually reveal his glory—his deity—to his people, yet he also knew this wedding banquet was not the time nor place.

Finally, we learn that patience results in God’s best. Jesus showed his mother and the wedding party compassion by graciously turning water into wine—his first public miracle.

We’re not just talking about a few bottles of wine either. Scholars estimate Jesus changed 120-180 gallons of water into wine. And he didn’t produce the cheap stuff. Customarily hosts served the best wine at the beginning of a celebration; then they brought out the cheaper wine after the guests dulled their pallets. Jesus, however, served the finest wine to the guests. He never gives us second best.

Jesus’ revelation to the servants, his mother, and his disciples deepened their faith in him as the coming Messiah. And it teaches us all the importance of submitting to God’s plan. This miracle teaches us that when we are faithful, God gives us the patience we need to endure the wait.

Elizabeth Oates (B.A. Baylor University; M.A.C.E. Dallas Theological Seminary) is a wife, mother, and freelance writer. She and her husband, Brandon, are passionate about family ministry and founded Project Restoration Ministry. For more information on her Bible study curriculum, Dealing with Divorce: Finding Directon When Your Parents Split Up, or to e-mail Elizabeth, please visit www.projectrestorationministry.org.