Right-thinking views wouldn't draw such readership if they weren't right-on
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Much to the chagrin of my liberal neighbors in Central Texas, the damn Yankee guitarboy from Detroit just keeps on raising Cain.
With pure, unstoppable, logic-driven defiance coursing through my veins and slamming through my fingertips, I am compelled to exercise my glowing, unstoppable "we the people" crowbar of truth in spite of the anti-Texan editorial policy running rampant in the newspapers across this otherwise Great Republic.
RECENT COLUMNS BY THE TEXAS WILDMAN
- 11-16-08 Ted Nugent: Obama's victory is sad vote for state of dependency
- 11-09-08 Ted Nugent: The few, the proud
- 11-02-08 Ted Nugent: America needs real change, not Obama's fantasy drivel
- 10-26-08 Ted Nugent: Grateful celebrity celebrates going silver-haired
- 10-19-08 Ted Nugent: Let's emulate my tap-dancing grandma
I keep looking, but for the life of me I cannot find any real Texans who agree with John Young. Go figure.
That I better and more accurately represent the Great Texas Spirit than my editors is tragic.
I shall carry on.
Since finally coming home to Texas, and after recoiling in shocking disbelief at the very un-Texas-like drivel I read in every major newspaper in the state, I decided a simple letter to the editor wasn't quite "we the people" enough for me.
It was time to insert the pulse of the best, most productive, real American Texan's point of view into the hometown newspaper.
I've been told that the online hits on my columns are more than one thousand times that of the liberal writers. Duh.
Of course, the lunatic fringe got its diapers all in a tizzy, questioning just who I thought I was barging in here like this, daring to express myself and defy the entrenched lefties. Clearly, I am far beyond the thinking stage, as if I need anyone's authorization or to qualify my credentials in order to flex my First Amendment-guaranteed, God-given rights.
Step aside, you pathetic little squawkersheep. There's a new sheriff in town, and he ain't backing down.
We're better shots
I'm from Detroit. It's not a murder capital because folks are more violent. We are just better damn shots. Get over it.
With all due respect to the socialist fantasies of my fellow writers and editors, and being the only author on the Trib staff with two New York Times best-sellers with an annual readership that dwarfs my "professional" comrades, little ol' humble me shall carry on, thank you, with more confidence and supported authority than my journalistic brethren. Guitar players just wanna have fun.
So as I bring in national and global media to conduct interviews, representing the most positive and productive of Texas and America, I will continue to celebrate and promote the self-evident truths that still inspire and guide the vast majority of good people everywhere. Get used to it.
* We know that hunting, fishing and trapping are perfect.
* We know that to keep and bear arms is an individual, God-given right.
* We know that "keep" means "it's mine, you can't have it," and that "bear" means "I've got it right here on me."
* We know what "shall not be infringed" means.
* We know all too well that "gun-free zones" are a guaranteed recipe for disaster.
* We know that the current system of over-taxation cripples entrepreneurs and small businesses while rewarding the most slovenly amongst us.
* We know that upon the death of a loved family member, the government has no rational right to one red cent of our families' after-tax savings.
* We know that the IRS is a joke.
* We know that throwing money at our failed education system will make it worse.
* We know that the current system of testing students is counterproductive to actually teaching them.
* We know that violent criminals should never be let out of their cages.
* We know that child predators should be put to death.
* We know that you cannot live the American Dream without speaking English. Properly.
* We know that generations of welfare brats are slaves to soulless policies.
* We know that Rev. Jeremiah Wright is a racist.
* We know that David Koresh was loony, but the government was guilty of criminal acts against its citizens in how its agents dealt with him.
* We know that ethanol is a joke.
* We know that Willie Nelson is stoned.
* We know America is doomed if we don't secure our borders from illegal invaders.
* We know that Hillary and Obama have made it clear they want to ruin America.
* We don't know what the hell John McCain wants to do.
* We know what "Don't Tread on Me" means.
God bless America and God bless Texas. Ted Nugent loves you.
Ted Nugent is a Waco-based musician and television show host. Contact him directly at tednugent.com.
